11 bizarro hidden celebrity “talents”
Everybody alive on this planet has some tricks up their sleeve that most people don’t know about.
For instance, I can fit my entire first in my mouth, a fact which I used to be very proud of in college when I didn’t embarrass as easily as I do now.
Celebrities are no exceptions. But while lots of them have super average hidden talents, like being able to juggle or cook, some of their talents are truly bizarre. And almost all of them are “talents,” if you know what I mean.
1. Kim Kardashian can smell cavities
Many statements have tumbled out of Kim Kardashian’s perfectly pouted lips over the years, but one of the most ridiculous has been her long-standing claim that she can smell cavities.
Basically, she’s the superhero the dental profession never asked for.
In her own words, “sooo weird huh!”
2. Justin Bieber can solve a Rubik’s cube in about the same time it would take you to give up trying
When Justin Bieber was still a baby, one of his favorite promotional moves was to travel around the world showing off how quickly he could solve a Rubik’s cube.
People ooed and they aahed as they screamed in unison, “Justin 4ever!!!!11!”
3. Hedy Lamarr used music to create a communication system that was kinda like wifi
Hedy Lamarr wasn’t just an old Hollywood bombshell, she basically invented wifi and cell phones.
Back during World War II times, Hedy sat down with some rando dude named George and put her thinking cap on. Together they figured out a way to manipulate radio frequencies to create an unbreakable code which enabled classified messages to be impossible for enemies to intercept.
And then years later when people were figuring out how to make wifi and cell phones work, they used Hedy’s communications system as a baseline for their work.
Pretty boss, right?
4. Pierce Brosnan can eat fire
Generally speaking, women would rather a guy eat her pussy than start sucking down some skin-scorching flames, but for James Bond-era Pierce Brosnan, she’d probably be willing to make an exception.
Think that’s how he got to be so hot, or nah?
5. Jennifer Garner can do hillbilly stuff
We’re not making this up. These are actual words that came out of Jennifer Garner’s actual mouth.
“Besides the saxophone, besides playing spoons, besides clogging,” Jennifer told Allure, “my cup runneth over with hidden talent. Anything hillbilly, I can do.”
This seems like a James Corden bit waiting to happen. Somebody call that cheese ball up.
6. Selena Gomez can do spitting tricks with chewing gum
Long before Selena Gomez had her revival, TV hosts used to hand her unwrapped sticks of gum and give her a look that said, “Start masticating now, girl.”
Much like her ex-boyfriend, baby Selena was expected to perform the same party trick over and over again in order to get good promo. And while Justin had his Rubik’s cube, Selena had gum.
She’d chew it up, spit it into the air, and then catch it in her mouth. Sometimes she’d even do it more than once, just so whoever was filming her had a chance to zoom in on the action.
The things we make our baby pop stars do for attention.
7. Taylor Swift can make snow globes that are just creepy enough to never be sold in a Hallmark store
And she has the power to make all of her friends do it too!
8. Margot Robbie can drink really fast
As if secretly getting married to a boyfriend most people didn’t even know she had wasn’t a hidden talent of its own, Margot Robbie can also drink really fast. Or at lest she can drink water really fast.
“I can drink a whole lot of water very quickly,” Margot told Allure, before adding, “but that’s not really helpful.”
With all respect to Margot, I have to disagree. Think of how much better your hangovers would be if you had the ability to pound water as fast as Margot Robbie can. You’d be cured before you knew it! Or think of all the needless calories your brain wouldn’t convince you to eat because it was so dehydrated you got tricked into thinking you were hungry.
Hydration: it’s more important than you think.
9. Kendall Jenner knows “all the words” to “every rap song”
In April of 2016, Virgil Abloh sent Kendall a note which read, “KENDALL, LISTEN TO MORE RAP MUSIC. THANKS, VIRGIL.”
Apparently she took that command to heart because in March of 2017, in a voice dripping with the absence of enthusiasm she told Estée Lauder, “I know every rap song. All the words.”
Again, somebody get James Corden on the phone. And while you’re at it, put me in touch with a producer. I should really be getting a finder’s fee for this.
10. Beyoncé is a Connect 4 beast
These days Beyoncé has an entire army of supporters who will look you in the eye and tell you without a hint of irony in their voice, that Beyoncé is a goddess incarnate, but back in 2008, she was generally just thought of as a talented human.
And after one very eventful night in Europe, Kanye West decided to tell the world that one of her many talents was winning Connect 4.
In his now-deleted blog, Kanye wrote:
“When I was in Europe I would play this game for hours and hours… it helped me zone out. Everybody would get envolved… Derrick Dudley (Common’s manager) and Consequence were the best other than me… I beat Lexi… Don C beat Jay… Tony Williams beat Common… but every now and then people would speak of this legendary connect 4 champion……….. BEYONCÉ!!! I had 2 play her!…
So last night at Jay’s new 40/40 club in Las Vegas (which is sidebar, crazy big w/ 24krt gold flooring, Black Jack tables, $500 slot machines,the biggest projection screen in the universe and the best turkey burgers I’ve ever had in my life) she beat me 9 times in a row! (and I didn’t even spaz lol) here’s a photo of the only game I won!”
Check out the pictures here.
11. Ariana Grande can sing like a creepy bb human
Ariana Grande used to be very into the sexy baby aesthetic, but she can also cross the line into creepy baby territory.