BROKENHEARTED BABE: Getting Over A Relationship ASAP

Welcome to Brokenhearted Babe, Galore’s love advice column helmed by Lexi Ioannou. An influencer and soon-to-be author of her own book, also called “Brokenhearted Babe,” Lexi is answering your toughest and most awkward questions about love, sex, and dating. Send your Qs to lexi@galoremag.com. This week’s question: How do you get over a breakup ASAP?

What are your best tips to getting over a breakup when it’s still fresh. And how do I stop thinking about him 24/7?!

I was once told it takes half the amount of time you are with someone to get over them. That quite possibly could be complete bullshit, but I like to believe it because it gives me a timeline. If you’re human than you already know you that you are not going to be able to get over him in the blink of an eye, but there are plenty of ways to steer yourself clear of more unwarranted emotional damage and to distract yourself from being pathetic 24/7. Even though we all wish we could get over a guy as fast as Taylor Swift was able to get over Calvin Harris, she is literally unrealistic and a part of the brokenhearted babe 1%. 

Delete Him From Your Life

Disposing of everything that reminds you of him and cutting off all communication is the best way to fully get over his ass in the long run — bad terms or not, you gotta do what you gotta do. Delete his number, unfriend him on your social media accounts and get rid of all of the shit you have that is his, including photos of you two together. He was your drug of choice for a while, so you are going to go through withdrawals and if there is no outlet for communication and no relics to make you remember the good times then the more likely you’ll survive this breakup.

Don’t Get Drunk

Because you will text him, make a fool out of yourself and will look desperate as shit. If you do chose to get your drink on, make sure it’s in the company of good friends who will take your phone away from you and refuse to let you look like a pathetic chick with emotional and alcohol problems. If you do happen to get drunk and actually not text your ex that’s because most likely you’re hooking up with a stranger who is probably a 4 out of 10, which you will highly regret the next day. Moral of the story, just don’t get drunk until your emotional wound has healed up a little bit.

Be Hot AF

It’s always a goal to be known as a notoriously hot girlfriend. But the name of the game has changed now babe and it’s all about indulging in #singlebabebehavior. Since you were such a hot girlfriend you now have to be an EVEN HOTTER ex-girlfriend. Taking care of your appearance will boost your self-esteem and remind you of how much that fucker doesn’t deserve you. There is literally nothing better than being an emotionally stable hot piece of ass.

Work That Ass Out

This goes along with the “Being Hot AF” part of forgetting your fuckboy, but it will also distract you from life for at least an hour and put you in a better mood. If you’re anything like me and absolutely hate working out, this will most likely still work for you. Whenever I work out I internally scream “I hate life” for like the entire time, but as soon as I walk out of that Pilates studio I’m like “WOW WHO IS MORE MOTIVATED AND SEXIER THAN ME??? EVERYONE LOOK AT MY TONED ASS BECAUSE I AM FIT AF!” Trust me, do it.

Explore What Else Is Out There

People always say, “In order to get over someone, you need to get under someone else.” Well that’s great and all, but what if you don’t want to act like a complete hoe straight out of your relationship? That’s where the beauty of online dating comes in. Get your damn cyber flirt on! There is absolutely no harm in talking to some guys on Bumble just to remind you how hot you are and how many other dudes out there would love to take you out. Let them boys slide into your DMs and you’ll be over that asshole in no time.

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